A little seriousness here today...

I'd like to be serious just this once - I'm used to being away for a while. I take a little comfort in the fact that I know The Shadow has an exellent hand in running everything and, let's face facts, things run a little more smoothly during those times when I'm away for a month or so. I get that.

But I've been gone for about 2, 2.5 weeks and when the four year old talks to me on the phone and just wants her daddy there - puts the phone in her bed and covers it up while mum reads a story, well that's just ... let's call it tough.

I'm facing the prospect of deploying next year and while the next few months will be tough, it won't be nearly as bad as it could/can/will be a year from now. At least now I have pretty unlimited internet access and phone calls. Next year will be a move not of my choice and limited interaction from a helluva distance.

To all those folks who have deployed numerous times over the past 9 years (or more) and keep sucking it up and going back - I salute each and every one of you. Think about some of military folks who in the last 9 years have been away - for deployment training and/or the deployment themselves -- some of these folks have been gone for 5 (and a few more than 5) years of the last 9. While I salute them unreservedly, you HAVE GOT to give it up for their spouses and children and extended families.

Before I left home I had the opportunity to spend a few hours with a couple old school friends, Jason and Scott. Great weather, calm water and a fun boat ride. Three dads with their kids and a big ole' lake. One of my friends, Jason, says to me, "I don't want this to sound corny or anything, but thanks for what you do."

At the time I kind of laughed it off with a "hey, just keep paying me..." kind of thing. But, over the last couple weeks that little scene has replayed in my head a number of times. I felt then, and still do, a little bad not responding ... better. In retrospect, I think it is quite possibly, the coolest things one of my friends has ever said to me. Not for the words, or even the sentiment so much, but just for saying it. It wasn't just a tossed-away 'thank you' that you get while in uniform at the store - it was, to me at least, something far more meaningful.

I (and by 'I' I mean 'we' in the sense of military people in general) don't really think about it that much as something to be 'thanked' for - especially if we've been in the service any length of time. And I realize, that he wasn't just thanking me and The Shadow. Really, he was thanking the hundreds of thousands of men and women AND their families.

It's important, and it's impossible to over-emphasize, the non-military members in these situations. When I leave, the kids were sad (and The Shadow probably was a little too ;o) but it was she who was left with the pieces; she who was left with the bills, the house, the cars all that stuff. When I get back - or when anyone returns from a deployment - it's also the family that has to adapt again.

When a parent is away temporarily a new dynamic takes place in the household and when that parent returns, that whole life-dance gets distracted like a needle being pulled across a record. Eventually, the needle settles back into a comfortable grrove and it's own, new rythym but it's another big change - mostly for the family.

When the Shadow and I were prepping for this move and talking to our non-military friends, the response was always the same ... "you're doing what?!" And as I think about this, I realize my civilian friends rarely are away from their families. Sometimes, you'll have the long-haul trucker or some other job that requires time away from home - but even they, usually, don't do it for months at a time.

So, to Jason, Scott and all the others out there whom I've never really replied appropriately to, I'd like to say, 'you're welcome.' And I don't want this to sound corny either, but for every military member, there are 100 people out there making America a place worth being in the military for. And having friends who can make a couple hours on a boat a far more meaningful experience than a ride around the lake - well, in the end, that's probably why we do it at all.